Still A Fighter
In the last few weeks I realize that it seems as if I have fallen down into a pit of my own undoing. Yes, it is true I have sunk into the bottom depths of my soul. I also realize that I am a self declared WARRIOR, and warriors don't falter right? Well, this one has suffered from a few blows that have left my head spinning. My response? Well, even the strongest of warriors need a place to rest, to find comfort, to regain their strength and their footing. I will find my way back onto the battle field soon. I have not lost my hope, nor have I tossed my shield or my sword. I am still in this fight and I will step back onto the battlefield again soon.
Relationships seem to be the hardest hit and the last to finally feel the deep pains of cancer's grip. The loss of a breast, and the loss of time that breast cancer rips from you can be overwhelming. Still as hard as change is, change can be good, almost reassuring in a way. Change can bring you eye to eye, strengthen and reaffirm your deepest of relationships once time slows down long enough for you to rediscover your life together.
As for myself right now, my body is tired, and my heart is weak. Loved ones my soul is merely bruised, and my spirit is still intact. I am just resting, finding my place again. Like a caterpillar, I am inside a cocoon, and in time I will reemerge as a butterfly with strong beautiful wings.
We all have go through these kinds of changes, heart breaks, soul inspiring and spirit reckoning days, weeks and months ... the difference is how you emerge. I may have fallen, suffered a set back, but I will not stay down. I will get up, I will spread my wings and I will fly. So, yes, my spirit may be weak and my heart may be mending, but I am still a fighter and I always will!