About Me...

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In a nut shell : I'm a wife, a full time working mom, a teacher, a Star Wars geek, comic book nerd, Disney enthusiast, hockey Mom, a decade long breast cancer survivor, and oh let's not forget such a happy, sassy, southern mess!

Wednesday, August 11, 2010

Being Ordinary

I have been asked many times what does it feel like to be a survivor? Did you ever really feel as if you were dying; did you ever want to give up? Well truthfully I am never really sure how to answer those questions. I guess if I had to break it down I would first say I am just an ordinary woman, there is nothing special or incredible about me, the only thing that may be different is that I have fought a lurking beast hiding in the shadows for the better part of the last three years.

I have never really felt exceptionally brave about going head to head with this breast cancer beast. In all honesty I have been more like a crazy; I don’t think so kind of gal in the whole the beast vs. me battle. I have just never been one to give up, toss my glove in or hand over the hope I cling too. I was taught to be a fighter, to be an optimist and through growing up in and out of the refiners fire I guess I always felt tomorrow would come either here on earth or in the glory of the heavens. Either way I have hope for tomorrow and I guess looking back that is the way I have always looked at it.

Have I ever run from a battle? Sure I have. Sometime you have to, but just because you run does not mean you can’t overcome the enemy. It just means you will return another day, at another time to beat the beast with a better strategy. I have had those moments sure when I was ready to throw down my sword, head into the nearest cave and just cry it all out. Did that make me weak? I really don’t think so. What it made me was human, ordinary and you know what? I like being ordinary and human, I like knowing I can cry and fall down and still have the ability and the courage to get back up and join the fight outside.

We are all just human beings, we are not perfect, we do not have super strength and we cannot take down any beast alone. We need each other, each of us ordinary people, coming together to beat this monster we call cancer. When we hold each other’s hand, pick each other up off the ground and rally for a cure we are a force to be reckoned with! We can beat the beast, win not just the battle but the war against breast cancer and all the havoc she brings with her if we just embrace this ordinary life we have been given.

So what does it feel like to be a survivor? Well it feels like a second chance, a new lease on life. Being a survivor means I am blessed to have today, even this moment I am sharing here with you now is one more than I had before. I have a voice now, one I never knew I had before the beast came for me. I have a bigger family than I ever knew was possible because I have each and every one of my co- survivors, my sisters and brothers, each beautiful and strong.

The bottom line is I may never walk onto a real battlefield, nor may I ever win a Nobel Prize but this I do know: I am a survivor come what may. I am a simple, ordinary woman with a crazy streak a mile wide, a deep love for life and a heart filled with hope for a day we can eradicate breast cancer from this planet all together. The real honest truth my friend is that being ordinary is better than being a super hero any day of the week.