If you’ve been anywhere near the Dowling – Olachia abode lately you’re painfully aware the last 10 days have been exceptionally difficult. I honestly wouldn't even know where to begin a full account if I tried. Let’s just say this, life has been very fast paced and nothing less than an unexpected exit down a high speed turbo express turnpike of the unfathomable. This whole idea of losing not just one but two of the most important people in my life, a week a part, has been absolutely terrifying. The old saying “in a blink of an eye" is resonating loud and clear right now.
First, I am beyond thankful for all of our tribe, both our family and extended. I don’t know quite frankly if we’d have any scruples left without those who have rallied, been at our sides and even sat through the nights with us. I am eternally grateful for the love our family has been surrounded with, it’s truly been overwhelming. And if not for my amazing husband, and precious children I may have lost my own marbles a lot sooner during these last couple weeks.
Life lesson # 34: Life's a gift, never given twice, always interchanging, moving and yes, fragile.
Many times we overlook crucial, critical moments, convincing ourselves we have more time. We close our eyes, ignoring the minutes counting down, just living life for granted. We get so caught up pretending we have plenty of time left we let life spin out of control. Before we know it we've forgotten to circle back around , to make up lost time or simply take a trip down memory lane one last time with those we love. We kinda live as if we're bulletproof; having all the time in the world but the harsh reality is we don't. What’s really tragic is the belief we can barter for extended time together when we’re already living on borrowed time already.
Why do we get so tangled up in so much rubbish? Life is just not as complicated as we try and make it. Time stops for no one, and the way I see it we have two options, you can either complain about it or live it! We can’t keep running around exhausting ourselves, living on fumes expecting to make our destination without incurring some serious damage. Seriously if we keep waving people off, passing them by and flipping the bird, how can we still expect those same folks to be willing to help us change a flat tire down the road somewhere? We simply can’t go around, screaming foul and blaming everyone else for our troubles when we ran the red light! Neither can we keep replacing those same people and relationships every time the wind changes direction. I just don’t see how we can expect any kind of enduring, stable and long-lived connections in the end if we’re so willing to toss people out with the bath water. If we continue living life in this kind of manner, in the fast lane all the time, we miss everything precious and beautiful offered us in the process.
Simply put, life is not for the faint of heart, it’s for the courageous. We can live a life full of strife and turmoil or we can simply live. Quite honestly, I would be exhausted living any other way than full hearted. More than ever I’m thankful for where life is leading me, and not vice versa. I’m also thankful and humbled by the life I have lived, by the love and family I have been given and raised by. My parents, my husband and children are all true blessings, gifts I could never forsake nor acquire in my own right. For this reason alone, the ties that bind us should never be broken or severed simply because we won’t compromise. So if I told you I wasn’t scared, I would be lying to each and every one of you, because I am petrified. Losing those you love is an unmeasurable pain. No, not in any universe, am I ready for a future without my morning phone calls, sweet texts, Facebook tags or afternoon lunches with my O’hana. This is why we have to learn to slow down, pay attention to what direction we are leading ourselves in. We’re all traveling toward the same destination; shouldn't we want to arrive there with a full heart, not an empty tank?
If I can leave you with anything, it's to implore you; reevaluate the direction you’re moving in. Ultimately, all things said and done, it’s about having the courage to take a leap of faith, to love, forgive and accept we can’t always be in control. If we know our time here is short, why waste it on nonsense? We may just have to come to a complete stop, looking all four ways in order to see the road ahead of us clearly. When we stop and slow down, our lives don’t look so bad do they? Sometimes you just have to get out of your own way! Just STOP, learn to sit and wait without a need to speed. All we have to do is move over into the passenger’s seat and stay as far away from the wheel as we can! In the end if we think about missed moments long enough we’d realize it’s time to take the detour we missed, make a U-turn and put the breaks on our current GPS. If we can’t sacrifice for those we love, what business do we have taking the wheel or calling shotgun anyway? Taking the backseat for a while may simply be the best bet, just long enough to appreciate the scenery anyway.
And at the end of the day, when my road comes to a winding end, I hope to have lived much more of an adventure than to have led a mere existence. Why, well that's simple, life, is all but gone in the blink of an eye!