Tuesday, July 5, 2016
LIFE LESSON #44 ~ 'Ohana is everything!
Family, I am forever grateful for those I call my 'ohana. When I have been at my lowest, it is my family who has lifted me back up. There is no greater love than the one I share for those who I call family. Time spent in deep conversations, bread broken together, laughter shared and yes even tears spilt are the threads forever tying us together. I love my family, all of them, both distant and close, stubborn and sensitive alike. I am proud of the beautiful people I share both my maiden and married names with, those I share DNA with and not. I am blessed to be part of the family I call 'ohana. Family, well it’s simply a love story we the author's write ourselves.
‘Ohana means family, meaning we are bound together. We are a tribe, a clan, kin, and blood, FAMILY. We are different, bonded through blood but created in love both separately and individually. Some are tall, others short with curly hair, dark or light, others are loud, many are shy, some seek the paved road, others want to pave it themselves, a few compose their own music, while a select few live to the beat of a different drum completely. The reality is none of it makes or breaks a family, not really. not if we don't want it to. We decide because as I said before, we're the authors, we decide on the edits and rewrites. It is a choice we make. It doesn’t matter where in the journey any of us are because the same blood runs through our veins. Each one of us offers something completely original in our own unique and distinct manner. Many bring laughter, some bring kindness, and others offer wisdom. Separately we are incomplete, pieces of a puzzle but together we are whole, stronger, indestructible, formidable and resilient. Family can be intense, it's the reality but we can also chose our preconceptions of each other. We alone have the choice to dance alone or together in the circle, laughing and imprinting memories never to be forgotten both good or bad.
Our clan, our tribe, our 'ohana either causes us to lose control or holds everything together. Family is the glue that doesn’t just bond us but forms the memories our children and their children will build our legacies upon. When I am with family I feel there’s nothing I can’t accomplish. I know when we are together; in harmony nothing can divide us. 'Ohana, is life. As I’ve written before (December 2014) family is everything. Nothing comes close to family, how we stand together or divide each other. Family is a complex beast, a constant giving and taking of time and emotion. We can be fierce, intense, strong minded, intolerant or sensitive to one other.
Life Lesson # 44 is simply this: 'Ohana is everything! As a family we are bound together; we are only as strong as our weakest member. It’s not about agreeing with each other all the time; 'ohana is about “cooperating and remembering another.” It’s about supporting one another; love transcends any disagreement or discord. In my lifetime I have seen too many divisions, clashes dividing loved ones. When I say no one tiff is worth the loss of a loved one I know it’s not that simple, but it is at the same time. We all have a little rebel in us, we’re divergent by nature but that shouldn’t completely divide us. Maybe it’s about meeting each other half way, embracing what makes us different, learning we all have a part to play in the story of OUR 'OHANA.
How much time passes or opportunities are missed, moments lost because we wait too long to relinquish control of a situation we never had any control over in the first place? Maybe too many of us are working too hard to change what’s unchangeable when we just need to love and let the rest go. What if we decide to just embrace what time we have left? Put it all way, take in the moments before they are gone, say what we need to say and let our differences ride the wind.
A word from someone much wiser than I: don’t let fear keep you from living, from dancing inside the circle. Let your fears go and let your love be unconditional. Your 'ohana is nothing short of a miracle, a beautiful disaster but it’s your 'ohana all the same. Embrace the mess we are, love your family and protect this heartbeat that connects us. Let’s live life, make our legacy unbeatable, indestructible, solid and impenetrable. Remember we are the authors, this is our story and we alone determine our reality (Star Wars reference). As Ahsoka Tano (again a Star Wars reference), says “This is a new beginning.” We are nothing without family. So I say to ALL my loved ones, I love you. You are MY 'Ohana...