Life lessons from this grown-up nerdy girl's amazing geeky life AFTER breast cancer. Pretty much I'm just an average nerdy girl who grew up to marry the love of her life, a former football jock and together promptly raised two amazing super nerds!
In a nut shell : I'm a full time working mom, a Star Wars geek, comic book nerd, Disney enthusiast, hockey Mom, a breast cancer survivor of almost a decade and oh let's not forget such a happy, sassy, southern mess!
"There is no force more powerful than a woman determined to rise." ~ Unknown
I have been called a strong woman but the truth is on my own I am weak. Through the years I have had my faith tested, my body scared. my heart broken and my life nearly taken. The darkness has come and been chased away by just the mention of His name. That name is Jesus, the One who has given me the ability to rise each and every time the enemy has come knocking on my door. I have not been fearless. I have not been strong. I am nothing on my own but by the grace of God I have walked boldly in the strength of my Father, rested in the peace of His Son and found life in the promise of the Cross. Hebrews 11:1 says, "To have faith is to be sure of the things we hope for, to be certain of the things we cannot see." And this is exactly the kind of boldness I carry with me everyday. As a woman of God I am filled by His grace, charged by His mercy and clothed in His armor. I never go into battle without His sword and shield in my hands. I walk in boldness because I know He never fails me. My desires, my wants may not come to fruition but not because He withholds anything from me. No, it's simply because He holds me in His hands, protecting me, guiding me ever forward, never backwards. When I think about it, my heart seeks the same truth as Renee Swope, "I want to be a woman who overcomes obstacles by tackling them in faith instead of tiptoeing around them in fear."
On my own, before putting on the armor of the One who has given me a new name, I would fall, unable to get back up. From the time I was a little girl life was hard. Nothing came easy. From being diagnosed with diabetes at the age of 8 to Triple Negative breast cancer at the age of 32 life has been a fight to the verge of death. I hid many times, but His light found me each and every time. Learning disabilities, no problem, He made me a teacher. If that isn't humorous I don't know what is. The girl who couldn't keep a tune in a bucket went on not only to be accepted into a music program but to start out as a voice/music major without being able to read music! Talk about irony. But you know what, it wasn't about me. I just sang with all my heart for Him. You see to my Father, and His Son, Jesus Christ it wasn't how beautiful my voice was at the time, no it was about my desire, raising my voice in praise to Him in spite of my limitations. And because of that, He breathed beauty into my song, raising my voice to glorify Him and Him alone. This is why I know no matter what the enemy has thrown my way, my God has been bigger, mightier and stronger. Yes, the enemy has stood over me, time and time again as I felt ashamed and worthless. He's whispered in my ear how incapable I am, speaking lies, trying to convince me I'm a disappointment, full of regret and dismay. But then something amazing happens and standing there in front of me is my Father reaching out His hand, a smile wide across His face, full of love, pulling me into His arms with mercy, grace and compassion. He whispers in my ear, "The enemy is not fighting you because you are weak child, but because you are bold in faith, and my strength is inside of you." That is when His words wash over me, covering me, cleansing and empowering me to rise up with more determination than ever before. In those moments I know I am a Woman of Boldness, an adopted and loved daughter of the King. Going into battle I am not alone, His sword is mine and the victory already His.
Today, I do not walk without fear, for I am made of flesh and blood but I do walk everyday in boldness knowing He has gone before me. It has been said, "The woman of God discovers her identity in Christ! She finds love, happiness, comfort. strength, respect, acceptance, joy and peace in WHO she is in Him! Her prayers begin to change. Her desires change. Her PERSPECTIVE is no longer the same. She doesn't find satisfaction by the things of the world. Her STRENGTH is in uplifting others knowing there is no competition. It is hard to find a woman like her. She is rare, secure and confident. She radiates love and respect! She trusts the Lord with all her heart and seeks His direction over her life. She is a daughter of the King." And this is my hope, my prayer and my goal each and every day. I want nothing more than to rise with determination , not only as a daughter of the King, but as a woman of God, walking in boldness putting on the full armor of Christ. What I know without a doubt is this: When the weight of the world weighs on our shoulders we can be assured there is hope , no matter the circumstances. You see His armor is ours, freely given to protect us and so we can walk in boldness on to the battlefield of life every single day. God's Word says this, "God is strong, and he wants you strong. So take everything the Master has set out for you, well-made weapons of the best materials. And put them to use so you will be able to stand up to everything the Devil throws your way. This is no afternoon athletic contest that we’ll walk away from and forget about in a couple of hours. This is for keeps, a life-or-death fight to the finish against the Devil and all his angels. Be prepared. You’re up against far more than you can handle on your own. Take all the help you can get, every weapon God has issued, so that when it’s all over but the shouting you’ll still be on your feet. Truth, righteousness, peace, faith, and salvation are more than words. Learn how to apply them. You’ll need them throughout your life. God’s Word is an indispensable weapon. In the same way, prayer is essential in this ongoing warfare. Pray hard and long. Pray for your brothers and sisters. Keep your eyes open. Keep each other’s spirits up so that no one falls behind or drops out." Ephesians 6"10-18 (MSG)
So today as I close this post, I want to encourage you, to inspire all who are weary, who are broken and pained to lift your heads up. God is there, He is reaching out to you with His hand, arms ready to exchange boldness for your fear. His armor waits for you, His sword and shield are gifts bearing your name upon them. All it takes is faith, giving all of yourself to Him and with humility walking boldly into His presence. Just as I began Life Lesson #152 ~ Bold Women, I again reiterate this truth. I have had my faith tested, my body scared, my heart broken and my life nearly taken but I have never been rejected by His grace. The truth is, there is power in His name. I call Him Father, He calls me daughter. By His mercy and grace I have been grafted into His family, given a new name, clothed in His strength and empowered with boldness. I am His and that is all I need to know. Nothing can separate me from His love. His armor is mine, His sword and shield with me always. What I know is throughout this life, I have come to understand a quote so well spoken by Darlene Schacht, "A strong woman knows she has the potential to shine in this world, but true strength lies in her ability to lay down her life so that God can shine through her." And my prayer for myself and you today is this, that we walk as bold women, humbly in His grace, our lives proof of His love, willing to lay our lives down and to be warriors both on the battlefield and on our knees.
"WAKE, PRAY, SLAY, in that order, everyday!" ~ Unknown